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La Push is the name of the idiotic poo fest Quileute Native American reservation near Forks, where Jacob and his tribe live. There is a "legend" there about a deal between Carlisle and the Quileutes, as a result of which The Cullens are not allowed on Quileute land. Since this agreement was made only one or two generations ago, it is not entirely clear why it qualifies as a legend. Perhaps there is some plant on the reservation that causes widespread partial memory loss. This boundary is very convenient for Victoria, as it gives the werewolves and Meyerpires an excuse to fight instead of paying attention to catching her. It has some small, barn-like houses, and a beach, including the famous cliffs, which the Quileute boys apparently use for recreational cliff diving, and Bella uses for idiotic attempts to induce adrenaline-related delusions to see hallucinations of her Eddiekins because she just can't live without him! This last function is the most important, as without it Alice (with her unreliable vampower) would never have told everyone Bella-Sue was dead, and Eddiekins would never have attempted suicide (unfortunately, he doesn't succeed). As previously stated, La Push also has a lovely beach, covered in tidal pools inhabited by colourful tropical fish (who are quite a long way from home) and driftwood. The beach is perfect for moping, indulging one's latent pyromania, and leading on an acquaintance in order to learn information about old Quileute legends.

The Real La Push Edit

...is filled with perfectly normal Native Americans, whose legends are completely devoid of pedophile werewolves and sparkly vampires. I'm not Native American, but Meyer- fuck you and your racism.

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