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The Amazing Acting of Kristen Stewart

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Alas. We have stumbled upon the new era of acting; breathing problems (Maybe she's asthmatic?) (Someone should tell this girl that the air is not going to leave very soon. So long as we've got the trees...)

At the end of the movie New Moon, Edward goes, "Bella, will you marry me?" Kristen Stewart takes the movie to a new level and goes "Gasp." Plus, why does she do that thing with her mouth? You know, where she keeps it open every five minutes, like some moron waiting to be fed. Seriously. "Hi Bella!" *Gasp* "My name is Jacob" *Gasp*. "Edward died in an accident yesterday. Yeah, they tried to resucitate him, but ... apparently being torn up in a car accident and then the car bursting into flames didn't go well for the meyerpire."

  • GASP -- FACEPALM!* "EEEEEDDDDDWAAAARD!"

Okay, so I'll lay off the girl for a little bit; there's not much one can do when you're acting out a girl who comes of as a shallow, brain-dead dumbass princess in the books. Yet, I've seen Kristen's other movies, and she does this all the time. Open mouth, gasp, close mouth, grunt. Is this some kind of ritual with this chick? It's like she's trying not to scream out in pain when she stabs herself in the heart with a rock (XD). I'm sure there are a lot of people who don't know how to act, but come on, how hard can it be? It's like putting yourself in some kind of dangerous situation with a new name you're going to abandon at the end of every day. Kristen should know this; apparently before she got to the point of the sex change puberty, she was a regular in the business. You know, just background acting. Big parts that did zilch for her acting ability.

IMPORTANT NEWS; Kristen Stewart got out-acted by a cardboard cut-out!

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